Tuesday, August 11, 2015

A letter to our big sister girl

My sweet dear Brynn Caroline,

Here we are just days away from our whole world changing.  You are about to become a big sister, and myself a mama to two baby girls.  Two, I can't believe it.  It seems like just yesterday I was bringing you home from the hospital.  And yet, here we are, almost two and half years later bringing another little baby into this world.  Your daddy and I have spent the last nine months trying to prepare you for what is to come.  We talk about baby sister all the time, have involved you every step of the way from decorating her room to setting up all the baby stuff around the house.  You seem to know and understand that something big  is about to happen, although we both know ultimately this will rock all of our worlds.

I wanted to write you this letter to let you know my sweet Brynn Caroline, that you were mommy's first born.  You were the special little girl who made me a mama for the first time.  No one can ever take that place.  You are the one that showed me just how capable my heart is of loving another human being, and how just when you think it can't be filled with more love...it is.  For the past two and a half years you have been the center of mommy and daddy's whole world and we have treasured every single second of it.  We spend all day, every day together and just thinking about spending these few days away from you while I am in the hospital brings tears to my mama eyes.  Ultimately, I know you will be just fine, you have always exceeded our expectations in anything and everything we have thrown your way.  

You are perfect, beautiful, incredibly kind, very in touch with other peoples feelings and have a heart of gold.  Your daddy and I say all the time that you have the most beautiful little soul.  I want you to know that you are just the picture of perfection to your daddy and I.  And, that we couldn't possibly love you any more than we already do.  It is important that you know this, because you might feel confused, and pushed to the side soon....and that's normal, but the thought of it breaks my heart into a million pieces.  I never want to make you sad, and your daddy and I will do everything in our power to make sure you don't feel second.  You are our firstborn, and our love for you will never ever change.

I treasure the special relationship that you and I have. We are insanely close and have a bond that can never ever be broken.  We are the best snuggle partners, and I will always treasure how you snuggle up perfectly into me to watch princess movies and read books.  I wish I could freeze time and keep you little forever and always remember how when you lay with me you rub my cheek so softly, plant little kisses on my forehead and tell me that I'm your best friend and that you love me so much....because I love YOU, so much.

Big changes are coming for us and our family, sweet girl.  But, I have no doubt that we will rock it. There will be a time that you don't remember what life was like before your sister, and that just blows my mind.  I know that this is going to be the best present that we could give you, a sibling.  You will always have each other, and I can only pray that you have a closeness far exceeds any expectations that I could have for you two.  A best friend for life, is the relationship that I pray for you two to have.

So, as we enter this new stage in life as a family of four I am excited for even more love.  I hope you know that this is all about love.  Our hearts can never be too full, you are the one who taught us that after all.  You are going to be an amazing big sister.  I have no doubt.  

And Brynn, I love you.  More than you will ever, ever know.


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